Tuesday, December 16, 2014

The Importance of Stages in a Relationship

When I was a kid I wanted to be older. Now that I'm older I want to be a kid again.
In the world we live in today everyone is in such a rush. People tend to think racing is all about speed, but it's not. It's also about pacing yourself and looking for the best route. If you just go fast, you're going to crash. The same goes for relationships -- people are rushing for that first kiss, for sex, meeting friends, meeting the parents, shopping together, moving in together, getting married, having kids, etc. -- people are going so fast that they greatly increase their chances of crashing. And even if they don't crash, once they reach the finish line they're driving on neutral the rest of the way because they rushed to do everything and they have nothing else to build toward.

I'm not here to tell you when you should be participating in which stages -- that truly depends on your specific relationship. I'm just saying if you slow down and take time on each stage not only will you appreciate each stage more, but your relationship will benefit greatly from it. A lot of relationships end because they rushed through everything. And don't do something because your significant other is pressuring you to do it. If your significant other pulls the "I guess we're just not as close as I thought we were" card (or something similar) that's a huge red flag! That means he or she is not afraid to manipulate you.

Take your time. The most solid foundations are built over time, as are the most solid relationships.

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